Quote (#578)

"I used to think that the brain was
the most wonderful organ in my body.
Then I realized who was telling me this."
- Emo Phillips

"When I took office, only high energy physicists
had ever heard of what is called the Worldwide
Web.... Now even my cat has its own page."
- Bill Clinton

"Spare no expense to save money on this one."
- Samuel Goldwyn

"The problems that exist in the world
today cannot be solved by the level
of thinking that created them."
- Albert Einstein

"There is a tragic flaw in our precious Constitution,
and I don't know what can be done to fix it.
This is it: Only nut cases want to be president."
- Kurt Vonnegut

Latine loqui coactus sum
- I have this compulsion to speak Latin

Quote (#575)

"Sometimes I've believed as many as six
impossible things before breakfast."
- Lewis Carroll

"What you do speaks so loud that
I cannot hear what you say."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"For your information, I would
like to ask a question."
- Samuel Goldwyn

"At times I think and at times I am."
- Paul Valery

Research is formalized curiosity. It is poking and prying with a purpose. It is a seeking that he who wishes may know the cosmic secrets of the world and they that dwell therein.
- Zora Neale Hurston, Dust Tracks on a Road (1942), Ch.2 : My Folks, p. 13

"Consistency requires you to be as
ignorant today as you were a year ago."
- Bernard Berenson

Quotes

"I cook with wine, sometimes
I even add it to the food."
- W. C. Fields

"I'm willing to admit that I may not
always be right, but I am never wrong."
- Samuel Goldwyn

"I hate mankind, for I think myself one of
the best of them, and I know how bad I am."
- Joseph Baretti

"There are no wise few. Every aristocracy
that has ever existed has behaved, in all
essential points, exactly like a small mob."
- G. K. Chesterton

"I've been trying for some time to develop a
lifestyle that doesn't require my presence."
- Garry Trudeau

"Statistics: The only science that enables
different experts using the same figures
to draw different conclusions."
- Evan Esar

Quotes

It may be the cock that crows, but
it is the hen that lays the eggs.
- Margaret Thatcher

"I don't think anyone should write their
autobiography until after they're dead."
- Samuel Goldwyn

Abortion is advocated only by persons
who have themselves been born.
- Ronald Reagan

A sense of humor is part of the art
of leadership, of getting along with
people, of getting things done.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

"Nature is wont to hide herself."
- Heraclitus

"When I give, I give myself."
- Walt Whitman

Quotaria

"A verbal contract isn't worth
the paper it's written on."
- Samuel Goldwyn

"You forget that the fruits belong to all
and that the land belongs to no one."
- Jean Jacques Rousseau

"Small opportunities are often the
beginning of great enterprises."
- Demosthenes

"Half the lies they tell
about me aren't true."
- Yogi Berra

"Common sense is instinct,
and enough of it is genius."
- Josh Billings

"Late to bed and late to wake
will keep you long on money
and short on mistakes."
- Aaron McGruder

Quotes

"The least movement is of importance to all nature.
The entire ocean is affected by a pebble."
- Blaise Pascal

"Nothing will work unless you do."
- Maya Angelou

"A wide screen just makes
a bad film twice as bad."
- Samuel Goldwyn

"I don't know the key to success, but the key
to failure is trying to please everybody."
- Bill Cosby

No one appreciates the very special genius
of your conversations as a dog does.
- Christopher Morley

Boyhood, like measles, is one of those complaints a
man should catch young and have done with, for when
it comes in middle life it is apt to be serious.
- PG Wodehouse

Quotes

"I read part of it
all the way through."
- Samuel Goldwyn

"Words are but wind; and learning is nothing
but words; ergo, learning is nothing but wind."
- Jonathan Swift

"Miracles are not contrary to nature, but
only contrary to what we know about nature."
- Saint Augustine

"The earth is the mother of all people, and
all people should have equal rights upon it."
- Chief Joseph

"I shot an arrow into
the air, and it stuck."
- Graffito

"The two most common elements in the
universe are Hydrogen and stupidity."
- Harlan Ellison

Quotaria - Samuel Goldwyn

Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist
should have his head examined.
- Samuel Goldwyn

"I never liked you, and I always will."
- Samuel Goldwyn

"Give me a couple of years, and I'll
make that actress an overnight success."
- Samuel Goldwyn

"The harder I work, the luckier I get."
- Samuel Goldwyn

"Television has raised
writing to a new low."
- Samuel Goldwyn

Pay no attention to the critics.
Don't even ignore them.
- Samuel Goldwyn

Quotes

"With a stop light, green means 'go' and yellow means 'slow
down'. With a banana, however, it is quite the opposite.
Yellow means 'go', green means 'whoa, slow down', and red
means 'where the heck did you get that banana?'"
- Mitch Hedberg

"Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Teach
a man to fish, and he'll buy a funny hat. Talk to a hungry
man about fish, and you're a consultant."
- Scott Adams

"In real life, I assure you, there
is no such thing as algebra."
- Fran Lebowitz

"I never put on a pair of shoes until
I've worn them at least five years."
- Samuel Goldwyn

"Conceit is God's gift to little men."
- Bruce Barton

"It matters not whether you win or lose;
what matters is whether I win or lose."
- Darrin Weinberg

Quotes - Oneliners

"A Hospital is no place to be sick."
- Samuel Goldwyn

"There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity."
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

"Gratitude is merely the secret hope of further favors."
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld

"We are the hero of our own story."
- Mary McCarthy

Many strokes overthrow the tallest oaks
- John Luly

Joy is the simplest form of gratitude
- Karl Barth

Quotes

Only one endowed with restless vitality is susceptible to
pessimism. You become a pessimist --a demonic, elemental,
bestial pessimist --only when life has been defeated many
times in its fight against depression.
- E. M. Cioran

"Do I contradict myself? Very well then I contradict
myself, (I am large, I contain multitudes.)"
- Walt Whitman

"Physicists like to think that all you have to do is
say, these are the conditions, now what happens next?"
- Richard Feynman

"I had a monumental idea this
morning, but I didn't like it."
- Samuel Goldwyn

"You get the best out of others when
you get the best out of yourself."
- Harvey S. Firestone

"An economist is a surgeon with an excellent
scalpel and a rough-edged lancet, who operates
beautifully on the dead and tortures the living."
- Nicholas Chamfort

Quotaria - Oneliners

Only the mediocre are always at their best.
- Jean Giraudoux

Men who never get carried away should be.
- Malcolm Forbes

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.
- Rita Mae Brown

Mothers are the necessity of invention.
- Bill Watterson

In the end, everything is a gag.
- Charlie Chaplin

"You've got to take the bitter with the sour."
- Samuel Goldwyn