Quote (#495)

"Life is half spent before
we know what it is."
- George Herbert

If a man is called to be a streetsweeper, he should sweep
streets even as Michaelangelo painted, or Beethoven played
music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry. He should sweep streets
so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause to
say, here lived a great streetsweeper who did his job well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

"People who have no weaknesses are terrible;
there is no way of taking advantage of them."
- Anatole France

"I don't have a photograph, but you can have
my footprints. They're upstairs in my socks."
- Groucho Marx

Every subject at some phase of its development
should possess, what is for the individual
concerned with it, an aesthetic quality.
- John Dewey

To find out what one is fitted to do, and to secure
an opportunity to do it, is the key to happiness.
- John Dewey

Favorite Quotes

Two paradoxes are better than one;
they may even suggest a solution.
- Edward Teller

"A child of five would understand this.
Send someone to fetch a child of five."
- Groucho Marx

Imagination is more important than knowledge,
for knowledge is limited while imagination
embraces the entire world.
- Albert Einstein

Any sufficiently advanced technology
is indistinguishable from magic.
- Arthur C Clarke

"Never laugh at live dragons."
- J.R.R. Tolkien - The Hobbit

"In Brightest Day, In Blackest Night,
No Evil Shall Escape My Sight
Let Those Who Worship Evil's Might
Beware My Power, Green Lantern's Light!"
- DC Comics: The Green Lantern's Oath

Quotes

"There are three social classes in
America: upper middle class, middle
class, and lower middle class."
- Judith Martin

"We need not to be let alone. We need to be
really bothered once in a while. How long is
it since you were really bothered? About
something important, about something real?"
- Ray Bradbury

"I've never struck a woman in my
life, not even my own mother."
- W. C. Fields

"The goal of all inanimate objects is to
resist man and ultimately defeat him."
- Russell Baker

"Anyone who says he can see
through women is missing a lot."
- Groucho Marx

"The purpose of life
is to fight maturity."
- Dick Werthimer

Quotes

There are three kinds of death in this world.
There's heart death, there's brain death, and
there's being off the network.
~ Guy Almes ~

Your lost friends are not dead, but
gone before, advanced a stage or two
upon that road which you must travel
in the steps they trod.
~ Aristophanes ~

If you have any doubts that we live in a society
controlled by men, try reading down the index of
contributors to a volume of quotations, looking
for women's names.
- Elaine Gill

Trying to be a first-rate reporter on the average
American newspaper is like trying to play Bach's
'St. Matthew's Passion' on a ukulele.
- Bagdikian's Observation

Those are my principles. If you
don't like them I have others.
- Groucho Marx

I'm desperately trying to figure out
why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
- Dave Edison

Quotes

"I have had a perfectly wonderful
evening, but this wasn't it."
- Groucho Marx

"I believe a leaf of grass is no less
than the journey-work of the stars."
- Walt Whitman

"The manner of giving is
worth more than the gift."
- Pierre Corneille

"If not actually disgruntled, he
was far from being gruntled."
- P. G. Wodehouse

"Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra
and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you
underneath. At night, the ice weasels come."
- Matt Groening

"People seem to enjoy things more when
they know a lot of other people have
been left out of the pleasure."
- Russell Baker

Quotes

"When people are free to do
as they please, they usually
imitate each other."
- Eric Hoffer

"From the moment I picked up your book until
I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter.
Some day I intend reading it."
- Groucho Marx

"Autobiography is an unrivaled vehicle for
telling the truth about other people."
- Philip Guedalla

"Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul
into believing in government and business."
- Tom Robbins

"The Army has carried the American ... ideal
to its logical conclusion. Not only do they
prohibit discrimination on the grounds of race,
creed and color, but also on ability."
- Tom Lehrer

"I'm dating a woman now who,
evidently, is unaware of it."
- Garry Shandling

Quotes

"The meek shall inherit the Earth,
but not its mineral rights."
- J. Paul Getty

"Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms
with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them."
- Samuel Butler

"I sent the club a wire stating, PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I
DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT ME AS A MEMBER."
- Groucho Marx

"This President is going to
lead us out of this recovery."
- Dan Quayle

"Why isn't there a special name
for the tops of your feet?"
- Lily Tomlin

"Life is a succession of moments,
to live each one is to succeed."
- Corita Kent

Quotes - Groucho Marx

I never forget a face, but in your case
I'll be glad to make an exception.
- Groucho Marx

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If
you can fake that, you've got it made. Life is a
whim of several billion cells to be you for a while.
- Groucho Marx

"All people are born alike - except
Republicans and Democrats."
- Groucho Marx

"I find television very educating.
Every time somebody turns on
the set, I go into the other
room and read a book."
- Groucho Marx

My mother loved children -- she would
have given anything if I had been one.
- Groucho Marx

"I was married by a judge. I
should have asked for a jury."
- Groucho Marx

Quotes

We must let the contradictions stand as they
are, make them understood as contradictions,
and grasp what lies beneath them.
- Hannah Arendt, Love and Saint Augustine.

Poison Ivy: He loves me. He loves me not. He loves me. He loves me...
Mr. Freeze: NOT! Surprise, I am your new cell mate. And I'm here to
 make your life a living hell. Prepare for a bitter harvest.
 Winter has come at last.
- Batman & Robin (1997)

"Fall not in love, therefore;
it will stick to your face."
- National Lampoon

"There is no excellent beauty that hath
not some strangeness in the proportion."
- Sir Francis Bacon

"The nice thing about egotists is that
they don't talk about other people."
- Lucille S. Harper

"It isn't necessary to have relatives
in Kansas City in order to be unhappy."
- Groucho Marx

Quotes

"You cannot make a man by standing a sheep on
its hind legs. But by standing a flock of sheep
in that position you can make a crowd of men."
- Max Beerbohm

"The best minds are not in government. If
any were, business would hire them away."
- Ronald Reagan

"Everyone wants to be Cary Grant.
Even I want to be Cary Grant."
- Cary Grant

"Is fuel efficiency really what we need most
desperately? I say that what we really need
is a car that can be shot when it breaks down."
- Russell Baker

"I have a mind to join a club and
beat you over the head with it."
- Groucho Marx

"How beautifully leaves grow old. How full
of light and color are their last days."
- George Burns

Quotes

"Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since
I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy."
- Groucho Marx

It's not whether you get knocked
down. It's whether you get back up.
- Vince Lombardi

Life is the first gift,
love is the second, and
understanding is the third.
- Marge Piercy

Life consists not in holding good cards,
but in playing those you hold well
- Josh Billings

Ninety-nine percent of the failures come from
people who have the habit of making excuses.
- Dr. George Washington Carver

I am not afraid of storms, for I
am learning how to sail my ship.
- Louisa May Alcott