Quote (#567)

"Give me a museum and I’ll fill it."
- Pablo Picasso (1881-1973)

"There are many men of principle in both parties
in America, but there is no party of principle."
- Alexis de Tocqueville

"If you're choking in a restaurant you can just say the magic words,
'Heimlich maneuver,' and all will be well. Trouble is, it's difficult
to say 'Heimlich maneuver' when you're choking to death."
- Eddie Izzard

"The first half of our lives is ruined by our
parents, and the second half by our children."
- Clarence Darrow

"I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that
my bath toys were a toaster and a radio."
- Joan Rivers

"If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell
him is ‘God is crying’. And if he asks why God is crying, another
cute thing to tell him is ‘Probably because of something you did’."
- Jack Handey, Deep Thoughts

Quotes

"There was a time when we expected nothing of our
children but obedience, as opposed to the present,
when we expect everything of them but obedience."
- Anatole Broyard

"I grew up in Europe, where
the history comes from."
- Eddie Izzard

"If living conditions don't stop improving
in this country, we're going to run out of
humble beginnings for our great men."
- Russell P. Askue

"All television is children's television."
- Richard P. Adler

"Where facts are few, experts are many."
- Donald R. Gannon

"With or without religion, you would have good
people doing good things and evil people doing
evil things. But for good people to do evil
things, that takes religion."
- Steven Weinberg

Quotaria - Oneliners

"All life is an experiment."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"When one teaches, two learn."
- Robert Half

"Patience is the companion of wisdom."
- Saint Augustine

"Never put a sock in a toaster."
- Eddie Izzard

"The big thieves hang the little ones."
- Czech Proverb

"First thoughts are not always the best."
- Vittorio Alfieri