Quotes (#461)

"My definition of an expert in any field
is a person who knows enough about what's
really going on to be scared."
- P. J. Plauger

"Idealism is what precedes experience;
cynicism is what follows."
- David T. Wolf

"When I read about the evils of
drinking, I gave up reading."
- Henny Youngman

"No one means all he says, and yet
very few say all they mean, for words
are slippery and thought is viscous."
- Henry Adams

"Illusion is the first
of all pleasures."
- Oscar Wilde

"Everybody hates me because
I'm so universally liked."
- Peter de Vries

Quotes

"those who do not know how to weep with their
whole heart dont know how to laugh either."
~ Golda Meir

"The problem with people who have no vices is
that generally you can be pretty sure they're
going to have some pretty annoying virtues."
- Elizabeth Taylor

"When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an
operation, he offered to touch-up my X-rays."
- Henny Youngman

"It is human nature to think wisely
and act in an absurd fashion."
- Anatole France

"Whatever you may be sure of, be sure of this,
that you are dreadfully like other people."
- James Russell Lowell

"The great aim of education is
not knowledge but action."
- Herbert Spencer

Quotes

When a naked man is chasing a woman through an alley
with a butcher knife and a hard-on, I figure he
isn't out collecting for the Red Cross.
- Clint Eastwood

If you're playing a poker game and
you look around the table and can't
tell who the sucker is, it's you.
- Paul Newman

"What springs from earth dissolves to earth again,
and heaven-born things fly to their native seat."
- Marcus Aurelius

I have long been of the opinion that if
work were such a splendid thing the rich
would have kept more of it for themselves.
- Bruce Grocott

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places.
He told me to quit going to those places.
- Henny Youngman

Doubt is not a pleasant condition,
but certainty is absurd.
- Voltaire