Quotes - Woody Allen

If it turns out that there is a God,
I don't think that he's evil. But the
worst that you can say about him is
that basically he's an underachiever.
- Woody Allen

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists?
In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.
- Woody Allen

"Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?"
- Woody Allen

"Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable."
- Woody Allen

"My education was dismal. I went to a series
of schools for mentally disturbed teachers."
- Woody Allen

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work;
I want to achieve immortality through not dying.
- Woody Allen